10. She's got the Tina Fey thing goin' on, and looks DO matter. That's why John McCain didn't choose any of the truly qualified republican women to be on his ticket. Now what will become her next reinvention of style? ...Let's see her take those glasses off, get some contacts and let her hair down so we can see what she's really all about. She's not a Bulldog with lipstick....she's a maneater!!!
9. She can really score a job interview! You have a phone interview--NOT a meeting with John Mccain and then 6 months later he tells you that he wants you to become his running mate for the 2008 Presidential election?!? C'mon now...that's definitely showing some tact there!
8. She'll put a rush on The Rapture and Armageddon.. She's an extremist! Let's see now, banning books from the library, pro-life in cases of incest and rape, and teaching creationism in schools. And we'd finally have someone in office who will admit that our invasion and occupation of Iraq is a "task from God". This is the "United States of Christianity" and we can't have someone half-assed and middle-of-the-road running things by worrying about other peoples beliefs and freedoms...we need someone who's full throttle baby!
7. Her mind will be refreshed and relaxed since she admits that she hasn't thought too much about Iraq and isn't burdened with the stress of and foreign policy experience, to weigh her down. So what we're in war? She's a smart cookie! Iraq has absolutely nothing to do with the war on terrorism and poses no credible threat to the United States of America. So why should any of us think about it? Palin doesn't. We should all take a lesson from this Alaskan governor ladies and gents.
6. She has the stones to stand up to those "good for nothing" community organizers. These garsh-darn community organizers try to look important, but have no real responsibilities. Well hell she's right! Community organizers do nothing other than raise awareness about corruption of government and social injustices, fight for living wages, set up education and job training programs, provide internships and fellowships for students, assist with aid for single mothers, assist with affordable housing, push for improvements in the quality of public schools, and help to expand health coverage to needy families by pushing for changes in Congress, . There's no responsibility in that!!!
5. She questions cruise ship gambling under casino gambling ban. Who needs casinos on cruise ships?? It's evil we say! EVIL!!!!
4. We'd rather have rolled joints, than white lines in the White House. True story; she actually admitted to smoking herb when it was legal under Alaska law. And since it's illegal, no one should be smoking it! NO ONE!!! Hypocrisy. It's a Republican tradition and she embodies it.
3. She opposes pornography in schools...meaning she's against explicit sex-education programs. We're not quite sure what "explicit" means, but maybe she doesn't want pics of va-jay jays and schlongs seen in books. Kids just really shouldn't see what male and female anatomy looks like. No way! These are the kinds of values that are lacking in America today...too much human anatomy shown in schools!
2. To reduce teen pregnancy and out of wedlock births, Sarah Pain slashed funding for teen mothers. See now this is genius. Maybe if you take away the money to support teen mothers then perhaps...just maybe they won't get preggers?? Ever think of that America???
1. She's a puppet, which means she can go on Sesame Street and tell the kids why mommy or daddy are over seas fighting Russia. See, because she has no experience in foreign policy affairs, she's being kept her under lock and key so she can learn how to become the next VP with Dick Cheney as her teacher. In fairness though, she can teach him how to hunt without shooting his best friend in the face. She's got better aim.
But the bottom line is, for all of us who LOVE "DUBYA", she's going to be our next George Bush and deliver another 4 years of huge tax breaks for the rich, corporate controlled bureaucracy, increased military spending and war profiteering, and most importantly continuing the racial and partisan divide that our country endures today and that's the way we like it! America is perfect in every way. We don't need change! USA! USA! USA!
Oh yea and by the way...we do need a VP who asks the question..."What is it exactly that a VP does....everyday?"